* Definition of 2 terminology which will be used very often in the diary :
Lajin (Stretch your Ligament) : La-Jin is a simple way of self-health management and when carried out correctly, can improve general health and promote longevity by improving Qi and blood circulation, and cleansing vital energy channels within the body
Paida (Slap yourself) – A Chinese Medical method which utilize patting and slapping of external skin areas to draw out and eliminate poisonous waste in body and restore health by facilitating the smooth flow of Qi throughout the meridians
My name is Josephine Lew, a Malaysian who currently resides in Auckland. In Apr 2015, I feel very blessed to attend the first Paida-Lajin self-healing retreat in Auckland. This is also my first experience in attending such retreat and I wish to share my experience hoping it would benefit all.
— Connecting with Paida-Lajin
I have heard of Master Xiao Hongci’s name about 5,6 years ago in Malaysia, and read his book 《Journey To Cure》Book 1 & II too. I have since been bestowed with a certain level of understanding regarding the master and his earnest advocating of self-healing method. In April 2015, I am so fortunate to chance upon it again in New Zealand where the inaugural camp is organized, I sign up instantly without any hesitant.
I have been practicing Vipassana meditation since 2000, it is a way of self-transformation through self-observation. My master is the Burmese Theravada Buddhist monk. Vipassana meditation is a method of mind training viewing things as they really are. This practice focuses on mindfulness and awareness.
I have been living in Vipassana meditation in the past 15 years and experiencing true bliss and solitude in life. In the last 2 years, I practice Tai Chi every day. Benefiting from the Vipassana meditation and Tai Chi practice, I am thus able to witness the changes within my own mind and body in the seven days vigorous Paida-Lajin process.
My mind is very clear and firm during paida sessions, consciously not reacting to the pain and hunger which allow my body to continue relax hence allowing myself to use my insight knowledge to witness the happenings of the meridians and all organs. As my mindfulness gets stronger, I continue at nights to watch the pains from the old sickness and went through an amazing healing process.
—My retreat experiences
Morning starts from paida-ing the head (crown, both side, forehead, back of the head, neck, eyes, face, mouth, ears), paida elbows, arms, shoulder, front and back of chest. Each group takes turns in paida-ing each other. As night falls, I started my normal bedtime Vipassana meditation by scanning into all parts and organs of the body through a relax retrospection until I gradually fall asleep. Tonight, my body is so tired as if I have experienced an internal “earthquake”, but the mind is surprisingly alert and bright, that keep me awake for the whole night.
The day starts at seven the next morning with meditative jogging, standing posture, sitting meditation, and of course, continuing paida, and paida all day long – longer and more intense than the first day. I feel more tired than yesterday.
After a sleepless night and a tough day, I am hoping for a good night sleep tonight. Least I know it is just the beginning of a nightmare. As I completely relax myself, I can see that my mind is performing x-ray scanning throughout my body, pausing at a cold dead spot at the calf of my leg, few inches below the knee since it is yearning for attention. The mindfulness then sinks into a sharp pain deep underneath the internal right hip. These parts are now shouting excruciating pain. I have to roll a towel to press on my right hip pain point to sooth the agony. Keep pressing for relief till finally falling asleep.
Today is our first day of fasting, paida-ing my outer thighs (gall bladder). Last night, the two pain points are along the route of outer legs so I let two companions of mine continue to focus on paida around these areas until swollen and Sha (poisoned blood and liquid) appeared on skin. Though in pain, there is a tinge of unutterable joyful experience that one needs to personally partake to fully appreciate and comprehend.
Today’s pain and fasting make the body feeling totally exhausted. I go to bed at eight o’clock in the evening. As I start to relax in Vipassana relaxation and preparing myself to rest, I feel my heart is undergoing a sensation of shivering cold as if in winter, eventually my entire body felt cold too. I also feel a very sharp pain at one spot on my inner thigh. As usual, I roll a towel over the entire leg and nursing on it gently. Feeling relief, I fall into a deep, sound sleep.
2 or 3 hours later, I am awaken by a very weird numbness in my entire right thigh. The numbness is so uncomfortable and is worse than pain. It takes me almost 3 hours to struggle with such distressing pain trying to sooth it all but to no avail. As soon as I realize my resistance on the pain in my right thigh, I start to relax the body, give up the inner fight, and total surrender in pain. At this time, I watch as an energy in my left ankle begins to search for something until it reaches the right ankle, and then to the sole of my right foot. There I find a big lump which is at the sole of my feet. I start to use the left leg to rub on this spot until it becomes softer. To my surprise, the pain in my entire right thigh is gone! I can finally get to have some good night sleep. (These actions appear spontaneously without any mind’s interference)
Last night I witness how my body is healing itself. I have eye problems, usually dry and tearless, with small particles and needs a little artificial tear drop to cleanse them. But today surprisingly after I wipe off some small particles, my tears flow naturally!
I attend the first session in the morning where we begin the paida from the inner right thigh (liver, kidney, spleen). Starting from my right thigh, with constant paida process, I can feel that my stomach is getting warmer. As paida becomes more aggressive, the entire chest is warm, eventually the heat spreads towards both ears (according to Chinese Medicine Theory, ears are connected with kidney) and slowly warming up my entire head.
At the second session in the afternoon, we continue topaida the left leg. Initially warming the stomach, my heart too feels warmer as if surrounded by a bright ray. My chest and ears are all warmed up, surrounded by a bright red light. With the increasing vibration of “qi”, I can visualize and experience” qi”(energy) turning round and round inside my stomach. This “qi” surrounds my stomach, spinning stronger, eventually forming a stream of laser red light erupting from the center of the stomach into the head, very much like a volcano explosion. At this point the whole energy body is truly charged up and fully alive.
At 9 o’clock in the evening I am ready for bed. I pray that God blesses me with a restful night sleep but oh boy, if it’s only god’s will or that much I wish …. Laying down, I immediately notice my right thigh’s discomfort (Oh my God right thigh again). At the external part of right thigh (gall bladder), there is also a pain point. I roll up towel again to press it to ease the pain. Pain just disappears, reappears in the hip. I stuff towels and press there.
After a while, piercing pain appears in the right knee by four fingers in Stomach meridian called Zusanli point. And then turn to right sore of feet bottom (YongQuen point). Each pain-point dissolves, another would appear, one after another. I am very curious what will be the next? I try to bear the pain, and consciously relaxing my contemplation of pain. It comes to my realization that every pain point has in fact a living memory stored in it. For more than 10 years consciously or unconsciously, I keep my triggered emotions in each one of the pain points. These emotions are the root of my pain I experience in my body these few nights. I realize that my body is trying to communicate to me through these pain’s DNA. Beneath each pain, there is an identity, awaiting to be understood and released. So, calmly I recite in silence – I am sorry, please forgive me, I release you, I am ready to let you go now. Thank you my Pain and I love you !”
The next morning, I am in tears, tears of joy.
This morning session starts with paida the back of my right leg (urinary bladder meridian). As the intensity of paida increases, my stomach begins to warm, and palm begins to exhaust moist. Warm energy slowly heats up my back, the stream gradually moves from the right leg to the entire right body, over the right shoulder, until the middle of the forehead. This “route” is the longest meridian I have ever witnessed. Therefore paida this urinary bladder meridian takes me longer time and greater efforts.
At 10 o’clock in the evening as I am getting ready for bed, I suddenly feel very, very weak. I attempt to trace those pain points like those in the first few nights, but to absolutely no clues this time round. However every part of the body is feeling unwell now, suffering numbness, fatigue, varying degrees of pain, swelling and tightness. This intense pain is very sharp, as if the body is going to be ripped into pieces anytime. I am overwhelmed, tossing and turning in bed, trying various means to relieve the pain, but nothing works. I too notice that the more I struggle, the body becomes weaker. Honestly, at this juncture, it truly feels the end of the world to me. I would be bending over to the phone to call for an ambulance if I am at home. The piercing pain is just too much to bear. I struggle for 3 hours (until 1 o’clock in the morning). All of a sudden realizing that every attempt is futile, I surrender and let it go finally …
So I relax the body in natural breathing. As I become more relaxed, I notice my right shoulder is rolling on its own. I experience and visualize an energy coming from the back of my knee, flowing out like lava from a volcano, to the sole of my feet. I feel these energies forming a force, pulling my leg backwards. Though it is a gentle pull like those yoga stretches, the pain in my whole right leg is just unbearable! Each time a new force is formed in pulling and pushing, the cycle repeats itself. For every twitching I experience, I have to take a deep breath to bear the excruciating pain as if in labor.
After this stage, I see the same form of energy originates from the back of the right hip. As the distance from hip to the sole is longer than the knee to the heel, the pain has also intensified in length and vigor, I can’t help crying with every knit. At the final stage, the back is rubbing itself back and forth against the mattress. This is to complete the entire healing process. I realize that throughout the whole healing process, I am one with the universe. Nature heals my body, in its own pace, till 4:30 in the dawn.
Today, most members in the camps return to normal diet. Since I have gone through so much healing, I decide to continue fasting. This is to allow my body to continue its healing. In such dire state, I know I am unlikely to paidatoday. After last night’s “tormenting agony of life and death”, augmented by an empty stomach for four consecutive days, I feel physically and mentally weak for the first time. I can only remember myself as a zombie, feeling hungry, frail, inability to focus, and just praying that this day will end sooner than I know.
After 11 o’clock at night, my mind suddenly becomes light and clear, and my body is restored with energy, as if I am enlightened. Last night’s self-healing process is continuing tonight. I once again stay in awe at the entire right leg’s self-healing process. This time, what I do is – NOTHING ! Relaxing my body and emptying itself, I embrace the rhythm of nature tune to fully nurture my body. To the contrast of my fatal wish in ending the torturing pain a night before, I am in total bliss and peace tonight! I am in deep gratitude and in amazement on the power of magical wonders of nature!
Today, a whole new world – feeling fresh, light, healthy!
7 days in the retreat, I clearly experience and visualize Paida-Lajin meditation resulted in my body changes, highlighting the following 3 benefits :
I. Complete Trusting
Only when you trust, you allow your faith to create reality. Through reading Master Xiao’s books, I believe Paida-Lajin method of self-healing completely and empower full trust on Master Xiao. In this experiential retreat, I only hear with my ears without using my head and mouth, without questioning, without my own ideas and consciousness. Everything that happens in the healing process is unknown, but natural and automatic, with a clear mind and a firm determination to witness. When I completely surrender, my body, mind and spirit have enough free space to receive and accept the healing energy from the universe and nature.
II. Be your Heart’s Owner
15 years of Vipassana meditation training let me be my own master, not subject to the authority of the mind. During the painful paida process, I can thus view “pain” as they really are and not being attached to it as my own.
III. Be Present
Who is paida-ing ? What is being paida ? When I paida someone else, I live in the paida, wholeheartedly in undivided attention, and I focus on paida-ing their body to excrete all the toxins, and focus on soul connections through each other’s bodies paida-ing each other. The whole Paida session has formed a resonant energy field, for others and myself, so powerful and immeasurable.
After intensive Paida-Lajin and meditation in the morning and evening in this seven-day retreat, the astounding harvest I reap is truly beyond my wildest imagination. I am witnessing a paradigm shift in my physical, intellectual and spiritual strength which has improved tremendously.
I AM REBORN !
Feeling sincerest gratitude for a renewed 2nd life, I wish to say ….
Thank you, my Camp Mates !
Thank you, Master Xiao !
Thank you, our Mother Nature !